Words Can Heal

“The desire for pleasure and the avoidance of pain. Almost all of our thoughts inevitably revolve around this desire” -Robert Greene
I don’t believe that it is a coincidence that the first book I ever committed to came at a very low point. On the surface I had it all. High paying job, nice crib, nice car, beautiful family, and everywhere I went everybody loved me. Yet, I was still unhappy.
When I first picked up Robert Greene Laws of Human Nature I didn’t know what was to come. As a matter of fact, I don’t know why I picked it up. At that time I didn’t have the courage to go and ask for help because I was scared to be weak. But there was something inside of me (Thank God) that was pushing me towards change. I needed to change. Desperately.
I learned about irrationality, narcissism, short-sightedness, and many other aspects of human nature that were brand new. The more I read the more my jaw dropped. It was as if my deepest and darkest secrets were being exposed. I thought someone had stolen my diary. But that couldn’t have been true because I’d never written anything.
I learned how my household conditions led to my patterns of avoidance. I learned that my desire for attention and pleasure started as a high profile naive teenager. I learned how my emotions controlled me. All my beliefs, notions, and ideals about society were put under a microscope and analyzed. It was as if I was undergoing an exorcism. Every new piece of information was shocking. Indirectly, I was becoming more self aware.
I was humbled and ashamed. All this time I had no awareness of the damage I was doing to myself or to others. I felt guilty. People always talk about looking in the mirror but they never say how hard that shit actually is. However, through the wincing, there was a sliver of me that was relieved. Eventually I forgave myself because at the end of the day- I didn’t know what I didn’t know. And when you know better you do better. I’m not perfect and never will be. I’ve allowed myself to heal because I am aware and I can acknowledge my shortcomings. I have a vocabulary for it. I realized that part of my problem before the book was that I never thought it was important to express your emotions and I never had any techniques to do so. This sprang my career as a writer.
Parker Palmer, an American author says: “Wholeness is not perfection. It’s embracing your brokenness as an integral part of your life.”
I’ve said things I don’t mean, I’ve been weak, I’ve failed, I’ve lied, I’ve cheated, I’ve manipulated people. This is what I kept from the light and this is why the bad habits grew. This is not something I’m proud of, but this is who I am. I’m able to embrace all of myself fully. Without hiding. At the end of the day, all of us are just looking for somewhere we can be free. A place where we don’t have to put on a face. A place where we don’t have to compete. A place where we can just be. My wholeness has allowed me to be real with others. It’s transformed me into a better coach and mentor and one thing I’ve learned for certain is that I’m not alone. This birthed compassion. A radical compassion for the human condition. It’s crazy how it all started with a book.
“Get free-be who you’re supposed to be” -Lauryn Hill
With peace
Latt
Are there any books, verses, phrases, quotes, that have changed your life? Any special words that you hold onto? Drop them in the comment section below.
February 3, 2022 @ 8:21 pm
Finding that inner peace is something I strive for everyday. I can relate to everything you said being defined by something became my persona, I had to stay in that character at all times. It wasn’t fun almost lonely. Being able to be me now is something I cherish and wish I discovered earlier. Love you brother. Keep being the bright light in a dim world!
February 3, 2022 @ 8:55 pm
“You can start late, look different, be uncertain and still succeed.”
-Misty Copeland
February 4, 2022 @ 6:11 pm
Lauryn Hill once said “you are the standard because of your own uniqueness”. We can’t fit into a standard when we ARE the standard. That’s what your quote made me think of.
February 3, 2022 @ 9:00 pm
Marcus, congrats on getting into writing. It’s a great therapy and a way to help and inspire others. I subscribed to your newsletter and am looking forward to receiving the content.
These three words help shape and guide me: Freedom, Hunger & Trust. It’s the same words that we use as our core values at Beardbrand. They work in harmony with each other and help me maintain balance in my life as well as push me to become the person I’m capable of becoming.
February 4, 2022 @ 6:14 pm
Thanks Eric.
I can see how these words can push and pull the spirit dependent upon whatever the day brings. Much love to you.
February 3, 2022 @ 9:09 pm
Love ya my dude! Keep inspiring!!
February 4, 2022 @ 6:14 pm
Love you brother.
February 3, 2022 @ 10:50 pm
When you were in young I knew you were bound for greatness, and in college your inner light began to glow.
Now, I personally think your bright inner light shines as a beacon of quiet goodness by going about doing great works along with your passionate love of all people; you genuinely love each and every soul in this world. You may not like what some people do or have done, but you love their hearts.
That’s why I love and adore you even though you still shy away from accolades. You cheer for others with no thought of any credit for you.
I love your videos because I can hear your heart, your soul, your discipleship.
February 4, 2022 @ 6:15 pm
Those words mean so much. Thank you- sincerely.
February 4, 2022 @ 12:25 am
“If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” – Jeremiah 29:13
This verse has always been one of those coming back down to earth. Or hitting the reset on my living for the world.
February 4, 2022 @ 6:17 pm
“Wholeheartedly” something I’ve learned that requires you to show up fully. Even in your pain.
that’s strong.
February 4, 2022 @ 5:29 pm
“You are already that which you seek.” Ramana Maharshi
One of my favorite quotes that always keeps me grounded. Proud of you fam! ❤️
February 4, 2022 @ 6:19 pm
Makes me think of the power of manifestation. What you speak will come into actualization whether you are conscious of it or not.
Thanks for sharing that
February 7, 2022 @ 1:56 pm
Mark 8:36
36 For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul?
In the race for success as the world views it, I almost forfeited my soul. But, when I surrendered my life to God’s perfect plan for me (almost 20 years ago now), I was, for the first time in my life, free! I pray that freedom, which begets peace, for every person.
You have a gift for writing. Please don’t stop.
February 9, 2022 @ 6:19 pm
If that verse doesn’t speak to our times I don’t know what does.
Yes! Freedom!!!
February 19, 2022 @ 8:04 pm
Marcus
You are a courageous man. You were also a wonderful kid , remember so well at Berry Shoals and Byrnes and greatly loved.
Your struggles are not wasted if they lead you to a closer more genuine walk with God.
Jeremiah 29:11-13 begins:
“For I know the plans I have for you” — this is the Lord’s declaration — “plans for your well-being, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”
Jeremiah 29:11 CSB
https://bible.com/bible/1713/jer.29.11.CSB.
Seek Him with all of your heart!
Blessings,
Beth Arms